Thursday, March 8, 2012

Fumbling for words

It's been a while since my last post.
There are many reasons for this, but the most honest reason is that I haven't really felt like it. I haven't really felt like doing anything recently. Last Thursday marked 6 months in Japan, and I still don't like it here.
If you think that my not liking where I live is why I have so many projects going're right.
If you think that I'm not trying hard enough to like where I might be right. If you can't understand how someone could dislike living in haven't visited this town. I'm a city girl. This is not a city. It's an over-sized town.
I'm blaming my current malaise on the advancement exam that I took last week. For the third time. And I still have no hope that I will get promoted.
---For those of you unfamiliar with how the Navy promotes enlisted personnel, it is based on points system. Annual performance evaluations give you points, as do awards earned and the amount of time you have been in the service. A huge chunk of the points comes from the Navy-wide Advancement Exam, which is administered to eligible personnel every 6 months. If you aren't promoted, you take it again 6 months later.
I've taken this thing 3 times. Every time, I score in the top 5%. I have very good evaluations, and I have earned a few awards. But the Navy is not promoting Petty Officers in my current job rating at this time. So, I can't get promoted.

It's a little disheartening.
And it spills over into the rest of my life.
Which doesn't help me like this town any more than I already do.
It also doesn't help me work on things that I would otherwise really want to do...such as the queen size quilt I intend to make with the Good Fortune fabrics I purchased last month. And the skirt I started. And the apron I want to make.

The good news is, this feeling does go away after a while. Pretty soon I will be a busy bee again.
Just not right now.

No comments:

Post a Comment